Author: S. Bolson

Dictionary releases second- and third-letter editions to eliminate first-letter bias

In an effort to alleviate the unfair and hurtful bias toward the first letters of words, Brentman-Hickok has proudly published second-letter and third-letter editions of its Fourth New International Dictionary. Aiming to be more inclusive and less discriminatory, the century-old lexicographic institution has at last put out their answer to the repeated claims of prejudice […]

Only Gutenbergs should play Gutenbergs

Should non-Gutenberg actors be given the opportunity to play Gutenbergs if there are Gutenberg actors willing and able to play those parts?  It’s an argument in the making, and one with serious implications for the future of casting in an industry fraught with controversy over who should play whom. That controversy recently spiked with the […]

Related murder victims?

Police in Maryland are investigating a possible link between a severed human foot discovered on a secluded road in Brandywine and a headless torso found on a dead-end street in Baltimore.  After two months of detective work, officers working the case have concluded that the victims may have been murdered.

Zombie food review: carnage at trailer park outside town

ParkStop RV Camp still has tender vittles if you don’t mind a little scrounging. by (formerly) Jim Acsadi Okay, we’ve all had this happen: you’re hangry, stressed and alone, with no time to track down a live meal.  Your feet are sore (if still attached) because you’ve been trudging for days through corpse-lined streets but […]

Easier done than said

Nothing is easier done than said. Saying it takes two syllables. Doing it takes nothing.  Not a thing. No thing.   That is what “nothing” means: no thing. But saying “no thing” was too much, so they shortened it.

Omg plz: look how we got ‘nentba’

2 April 2113 New England Journal o’ Net Lingo, 9(3) Research pioneered by Seamus P. Hoffstead, PhD in the field of abbreviations’ history has yielded stunning revelations concerning the etymologies of many digislang terms, notably this ironic gem from almost a century ago. Printed below is a recently decoded SMS exchange between Holly Harmon and […]

How do you like your vaccine?

More than 4,000 doses of the COVID-19 vaccine were wasted in Maine as they had reached a temperature too high to remain effective, while in Michigan nearly 12,000 doses were thrown out because they had gotten too cold. But in New York, the third bowl of vaccine was juuuust right.