Advanced tech empowers people to better submit to unelected authority

Jacking your tech stack is a great way to show the authorities who’s boss (they are).

Are you experiencing depression, anxiety, or the pangs of some indefinable need that, no matter what you do to counteract your pain, will not be fulfilled?  Are you searching for some deeper, greater meaning to the tribulations that the world hurls at you in a never-ending onslaught of exhausting challenges?  Do you feel lost or without hope, despite the help of family, friends, and professional therapists, counselors, and specialists?

If you answered ‘yes’ to any of the above, something is missing in your life.  Something important.  No, not love, nor inner peace or spiritual tranquility — forget those dead ends.  What you need is technology. 

Imagine: you’ve just clocked out after a stressful day of protracted meetings, missed deadlines, and dangerous over-caffeination.  Now, the Carbon Police are knocking down your door because you underreported your household’s natural gas usage on your last Q-130b.

Darn, you think to yourself.  You were so sure you’d submitted that digital form on time and through the right online portal.  There are just so many of them (forms and portals).  Surely the fair and balanced SWAT officers who are simply doing their jobs will understand that your transgression was an innocent oversight.

As the dark muzzles of their standard-issue M-16s stare at you blankly with occult menace and your spunky brown terrier, Godfrey, lies lifeless on your blood-stained carpet, shot to death because he was barking too loudly at the armed and masked men in your living room, you breathe a sigh of relief.  Why?  Because you’ve got SerfPass.

With SerfPass, you never have to worry again about failing to comply with the oppressive laws and ordinances of any despotic government that shills for an illegitimate state entity.  Just sign up, log in, and tune out the outright tyranny unfolding before your incredulous eyes.  

Think of the freedom.  Instead of worrying about whether or not you forked over your last $32 in Central Bank Digital Currency to the unelected bureaucratic authorities who will put it to good use by ensuring that their incursions into homes like yours remain timely and productive, you can sit back, relax, and flash your SerfPass to whatever platoon of unannounced visitors are gracing your presence at any given moment.

Sure, you’ll have to pay for the removal of Godfrey’s corpse to avoid being cited for a C-563 violation (failure to dispose of the carcass of a pet dispatched by Carbon Police).  But, in the event that you are issued a citation, all you’ll have to do is raise your arm in a manner that won’t appear too threatening to the trigger-happy foot soldiers who are trained to stand down once they see a SerfPass in your hand.  

SerfPass.  It’s how smart people avoid being trounced by jackbooted thugs.  Get yours today.