Did this year’s Russian invasion of Ukraine cause last year’s inflation?  Da.

The invasion of Ukraine was so devastating that it caused a dollar devaluation that had already happened.

When Pouty Putin and his putrid goons defiled the glorious nation of Ukraine by violating its sovereign borders on February 24, 2022, they were bringing a lot more with them than we’d thought: retroactive inflation.

The telltale signs are there.

When did inflation start to get really bad?  2021.  

When did those armies of the villainous fiend from Leningrad make their belligerent way across the anointed lands where the great Chernihiv, Sumy and Kyiv stand united against their aggressors?  2022.  

You see?  Classic retroactive inflation.

Physicists and metaphysicists have been pondering this enigma since the shockingly sickening invasion began: By what mechanism were the actions of Russia’s war machine in 2022 able to bring about the surge in currency inflation that began in 2021?  

Now that Science is on the case, shortly Dr. Fauci or one of those state-approved physicians ought to be giving us an update on their progress into answering that question once and for all.  They shouldn’t be too busy now since no one cares about what’s-it anymore.  You know, that horrifying pandemic that stopped being an issue around the time the Russian horde swept through Eastern Europe, massacring babies and blind dogs.

The search for what enables the phenomenon of retroactive inflation is funded generously by taxpayer dollars, and so everything that can be done about the problem is not only being done about it, it’s being paid for by you.  And there are many expensive things in “everything,” such as:

  • Cold fusion
  • Particle acceleration
  • Anti-gravity experiments
  • High-altitude aerial spraying
  • Matter/antimatter collisions
  • Covert operations & nation building
  • Remote viewing
  • And many more!

One of these must get to the bottom of retroactive inflation.  Otherwise, you may want to think about stocking up on the next reserve currency of the world.  Not the ruble, though, since that’s Russian and, in case you’re just joining us, anything Russian is bad now.  Da?  


Soon the legions of unholiness emanating from the pit of Putin’s nightmarish wasteland of an empire shall be repelled by the brave and righteous heroes who get airtime on western television — courageous souls like that guy who played President of Ukraine in Servant of the People and, for that matter, all actors who are responsible for creating laws and policies at the national or federal level.

There may be no end to retroactive inflation.  It might be here to stay.  But, that could be a blessing in disguise.  If they discover that Saddam Hussein’s 1990 incursion into Kuwait was the cause of Jimmy Carter’s stagflation of the 1970s, the former president may be ripe for a comeback.