Top 10 excuses for being late to work, i.e. zoom call

Working remotely can allow you extra time to spend on family, rest, hobbies and other distractions.

That whole “train was delayed” story won’t do in a remote work situation, so how do the cool kids handle those tense explainy moments when they sign in late and have to announce their tardiness?  So jazzed you asked.  You’re probably late for a semi-crucial or higher event right now so without any further ado or hindering commas we bring you the…

Top 10 Excuses for Remote Workers Logging in Late

  1. “My computer’s got a virus.  Could be Covid.  Just waitin’ to hear back.  So, what’s good, y’all?”
  2. “My [business-related topic] class went over.  Can’t wait to flex my new skills with you lot.”
  3. “My crappy’s been internet all morning — scrambled get messages… [squint at screen]  Hello?” 
  4. “I thought we said Greenwich BEAN Time.”
  5. “I was stuck in traffic…king narcotics.  The legal kind — it’s a side hustle.”
  6. “Just keeping my sick kid from dying at the age of [plausible whole number].  Apologies.”
  7. “My shift at the soup kitchen went overtime and then on my way home I stopped to give my coat and wallet to a blind orphan who was trying to raise money for her autistic Labrador’s heart transplant.”
  8. “Bathroom, guys.  Ya gotta go, ya gotta go.  Hey, is that a new chair, Paul?”
  9. “I got carried away on the C150 which I deprioritized when the R320 came through, so I reprioritized the whole workflow to include the new additions to the pipe, and then, yada yada yada, I’m here.  Sorry I’m late.”
  10. “My [close familial relation]’s got Covid.  So, you know.”

These work practically every time.  Feel free to use and share!  Try out the shorter excuses first, and then branch out to the ones that are harder to memorize once you’re comfortable.  After a while you’ll be ready to throw in a few of your own as being late to work always needs an excuse, whether it’s yours or not.  [Wink.]